Sunday, December 10, 2006

so, what is it you do?

here's a list of things i am mildly proud of within the last few weeks.

Macho actiton drives Mel's bloody, Aztec epic
My review of Apocalypto. In hindsight, I realize that they are Mayans. Ironically, our copy editor did change my first draft to read "Mayan" instead of "Aztec." Our fact checker, who is a paid employee, then changed all uses of the term "Mayan" to "Aztec."
Either way, I am told I am an "entertaining critic" and not a "real critic." Therefore it doesn't matter a good goddamn what I actually write.

'Architect,' 'Night' top Idiot's X-mas list
This hede was written by our copy editor. I like the mild amount of spite involved.

A 'Stranger' Ferrell thrives without the laughs
My former editor/Reeler freelancer claims this is one of the worst, most pseudo-conversational pieces I've ever written. I kind of agree, if just because I liked it.

What Is Crispin Glover?
I talked with Crispin Glover for roughly 50 minutes. We mainly talked about the MPAA when we realized he was there to promote his film and slide show. He remains one of my favorite interviews if just because he knew exactly what he wanted to say and was adament I make sure he was accurately quoted.

Wires have living room appeal
My interview with Wires on Fire. I planned this interview for a week. And it basically kept failing until after they played their last show during CMJ at Bowery Ballroom, the lead guitar/singer's girlfriend got sick, and Jeff Lynn was fucking stoked to see Priestess.
Basically, it went as well as I could have expected.

Bigotry, bears and Borat
I review Borat.

Bush whacked: fake doc slays viewers
I review Gabriel Range's "Death of a President," dislike it. Andrew O'Hehir tells me he does not approve and thinks I lack my usual wit. I crawl into whiskey bottle and pray for sweet inspiration.

I'm kidding.
I get inspiration from Gin too.

Webcomic tackles movie reviews
I speak with Joe Dunn of Joe Loves Crappy Movies. This was done a long time ago, back in August or so I believe. A majority of the interview doesn't make it in since we basically just discussed Stick It and its' cultural implications.
But it remains one of the few interviews I enjoyed doing--and buy some DPO shirts. I wear my "I Love Crappy Movies" shirt with pride as I edit.


that's basically all I do.


I also wrote a DVD Haiku for the Volume Two of Ultraman.
So, I claim "Tokyo" was three syllables to just get this in. But even after I confirmed it, they changed my final word to "JAPAN." Because that makes sense.

So here's my original haiku, complete with geek love.


Men in rubber suits
excite me by destroying
Tokyo. SHUWATCH!

(if anyone asks, that exclaimation point is a syllable. i also claimed tokyo was three, when my roommate corrected me on it being two.)

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